Articles & Essays
Dining With Duncan
The Problem With Chicken Nuggets
Once upon a time, and a short time ago it was at that, there lived 500 college students in a fairytale land of classes, scheduling, tests, papers, due-dates, and very late nights. These teens and 20-somethings lived in a magic castle, known to all throughout the land as Collins Living Learning Castle. Although the evil, wicked Igor D. S. wanted all the other kingdoms to believe that the true name of the castle was The Collins Hippy Militant Lesbian Castle and Crack Den, and that even the boys were militant lesbians. Igor D. S. wanted to find a way to control the magic CLLC, so he put the same bland chicken pieces in their dining hall almost every day. These nibblings were known as Chicken Tenders, Chicken Tenderloins, Chicken Fingers, Chicken Pieces, and many other names. Sadly, they were all the same, and Igor D. S. was beginning to turn Collins residents into a bunch of very sad eaters. They had the Chicken Tender Blues. But suddenly, boys and girls, the magic wizard, Duncan-Cadabra, came to the rescue. He gave this magic spell to the students in Collins Living Learning Castle:
Spicy Cream Cheese Chicken Sandwich
You need: oregano, basil, cream cheese, chicken tenders, spinach, bagel
Take enough cream cheese for a regular breakfast bagel and mix it with 1/4 teaspoon basil and two pinches of oregano. Stir thoroughly. Spread on bagel, then build a sandwich with the chicken tenders and the spinach.
This magic recipe cured the students of CLLC from the Chicken Tender Blues, and everyone, except Igor D. S., was very happy. The End.
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